This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
