I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize