Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
