i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
