all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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