So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
