DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Holy shit dude........stairs
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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