I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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