just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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