I'd wear matching sweaters with you
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize