how can u be prego again
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
