oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
