just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
