dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
My thoughts exactly.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass