we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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