just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
