he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize