I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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