That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
