Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize