I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Randomize
