i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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