He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
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