'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
