somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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