I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
