Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
