So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
