"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
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