Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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