Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
