Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
