We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
