I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize