matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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