My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
handjob tips. give me some.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
