people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
