it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
