did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize