Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize