Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
