would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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