Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
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