I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I'm both gender and math confused
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize