There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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