here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
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