Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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