Can Purell be used as lube?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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