my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
