please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
