there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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